Stealing the magic of our days this little thief appears out of thin air. Taking our days and our nights and making our time worth less than the breaths we forget each day. Depression, anxiety, stress, all these names, perhaps one monster, perhaps many. All the forms of darkness take one form and take the forms of many.
Powerful emotions have flowed through me my whole life. Highs and lows from the happiest to the saddest. My life, this rollercoaster on a trampoline in an airplane crashlanding during an earthquake, and all its bits and pieces, it’s what I’ve made of it.
The darkness and despair have always found me, they have always found their way into me, into my art, and my heart. In many ways the sadness, the quiet moments of wishing death that only the most personal of persons could know, this is what drives me.
Am I the darkness that inspires me on the one hand to create works of art to inspire and affect people, or is it the lies I tell myself that keep me making one questionable decision after another. These and many answers I do not know, but I do know that I do know this demon, these demons, and they often tell me what to say and how to act.
Maybe it’s ego, a part of ourselves which gives us this darkness and glimpses of the light. In comparison to our selves this lack of seeing seems as though it is the enemy, but in reality, it is the inspiration.
The lack of light is the way to see. The lack of understanding is what gives us the ability to have faith. For as we walk, by choice through the dark we end up in the places where we never knew, and the places we only imagined.
Peer into the darkness and begin to see the light. These demons are my inspiration, giving hope for a better tomorrow, of my own doing, exactly the angel that I seek.
Today was an energetically dense day and as I contemplate my life, my worth, my commitment to living until death, I realize that in all of my years of making art, being driven by the darkness. I never let the darkness speak. I filter the sadness through a socially acceptable filter and present it as my hunky dory life when in reality it’s the despair that wishes to sing. It’s deep in the depression that my voice has been both lost and forever found.
I love my demons and adore my failures. I love the parts of me that tell me; I’m, no good, and the part of me that says that I fail and fail and fail. The parts of me that see no good in me. This demon though it may not be my friend it is my ally. A partner that allowed me to face oh so many fears and reach potentials which I have always felt the need to strive towards.
This part of the story is about the demons, there are heroes too, but the demons, the monsters make the story take place. Not to celebrate the bad in people or the bad in the world, but to acknowledge it and transmute it into another form. The darkness inspires the light when persuaded and allowed
The transmutation of negative to positive has become the basis for my work. And the goal I have is to begin confronting the monsters, my monsters, and the monsters that have taken hold of this city. And through art and participation, I aim to take a few of these cities demons and begin to make them serve us instead of destroying us.
The Villagers is an art project in which a team of artists and I will create socially conscious works of art and organize participatory events which will have a noticeable effect on the landscape and culture of the city of Pueblo.
I give almost all of myself to my art, and now I wish to give that self to the city of Pueblo in the State of Colorado. Pueblo is the Village, our Village, and it’s time we take control of the village and stop letting it be controlled by the fear we have of monsters, but by the way we interact with the monsters themselves.
The Village Walls project has begun and is taking place in a New Building, over the next weeks more and more will be revealed. Stay tuned. For now, though I move forward with this work with all the energy I have.
The series of characters which I am working on in conjunction with this project are called “The Villagers” This shirt represents one of the “villains” in the series, stay tuned for much more to come.
The work is made possible through donations, sales of merchandise, and commissioned art pieces. Any and all donations and purchases are so very much appreciated and used in ways which serve the community through me and my dedication to working towards making Pueblo a more enjoyable place to be.